5/17/09

PONDERING THE PLAYOFFS



The NHL and NBA are deep into the playoffs now. A few thoughts, the first of which is why the hell are they still playing? When I’m elected Grand Exalted Poohbah in Charge of Everything the following rules will apply:

· Absolutely no hockey after April 30 or before October 1.
· No pro basketball after May 15 or before October 15.
· No pro football in the summer. Ever. Under any circumstance.
· The World Series must be finished by October 20. The MLB season may not begin until April 15.



The Only Reason to Watch the Rangers!


National Hockey League:

· The collapse of the Sharks is stunning. The Bruins were right; Joe Thornton is the reincarnation of Eric Lindros—lots of talent, no guts.
· I root for the Rangers, a hobby only slightly less painful than pounding nails in my own forehead, but Hendrik Lundquist is a great goalie.
· I was disgusted by the way the Boston Globe trashed the Bruins when they were “upset” by the Hurricanes. So which of their brilliant experts picked the Bruins to be in the chase for the President’s Cup? This gritty, well-coached bunch overachieved all year and their achievement should be celebrated. Still another reason why out-of-towners can’t stand Boston sports fans and their all-or-nothing smugness.
· They may not win the Stanley Cup—though I’d not bet against it—but it’s a sheer delight to watch the Red Wings. They are disciplined, skilled, and fundamentally sound.
· Can’t stand the Penguins or Girly Boy Crosby, but I want them to beat the Hurricanes. Anything to hasten the demise of hockey south of the Mason-Dixon.
· Another year with no Cup in Canada. When it finally comes all of the Great White North will worship the team that delivers it.
· Will someone please shoot Gary Bettman so the Coyotes can move to Hamilton?




The NBA Unveils its New Logo


National Boring Association

· How can March Madness be so exciting and the NBA playoffs such a crashing bore?
· Millions of kids are shooting hoops all across America. So why can only a handful of NBA players hit a 20-foot J and make a free throw? And why are three-quarters of them European? Might be time to turn off the ESPN dunk highlights and enroll in fundamentals drills classes.
· If I coached the Orlando Magic I’d do to LeBron James what teams did to Michael Jordan when he was young: concede his 35 ppg. and shut down everyone else. It’s still a team game.
· Count me among those who don’t buy the James hype. I’m in awe of his natural ability, but his basketball IQ remains suspect.
· Will the NBA brass and accountants commit hari-kari if the Nuggets win it all? I’d love to see it. Denver is one of the few teams that’s actually fun to watch. And what were the Celtics thinking when they let Chauncey Billups go?
· Speaking of the Celtics, hope fans (me included) enjoyed last year’s championship because it’s the last one they’ll see for awhile. All the attention was on Kevin Garnett, but the guy who’s done is Ray Allen. Management should start rebuilding this team around Rajon Rondo and phase out the Big Three. Resign Big Baby; he’s a keeper. No one else on the bench warrants a second thought. (Well, maybe Bill Walker.)
· The upcoming draft looks weaker than Dick Cheney’s morality. Anyone with a mid-round or lower pick (like the Celtics) ought to move that pick for proven talent.

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