WHERE TO INVADE NEXT (2015/2016)
Directed by Michael
Moore
Dog Eat Dog Films
110 minutes, R
(language and naked people jumping into water—Really?)
* * * * *
Two stories we love to tell: (1) The United States is the
greatest nation on earth. (2) The world envies us. The first isn’t remotely
true and you have to crawl pretty far down the pole for the second to be the
case. The USA is number one in the world in military hardware, graduate school
education, and medical technology, and the last two only if you can afford
access. As for being the envy of the world, sure, if you’re from impoverished
sub-Saharan Africa, a dictatorship, or from a war-torn failed state like Libya,
Somalia, or Syria, though some of them are so desperate even the shattered
economy of Greece looks pretty good. Still, Americans like to delude themselves
into thinking life doesn’t get any better. Maybe that’s a necessary coping
mechanism; as Michael Moore shows in his latest documentary—his best to date–it’s
pretty damn depressing to consider how far we've strayed from American ideals.
Moore opens with a funny, but cheesy set-up: the military
has come to him for answers as to why it hasn’t won a single conflict since
World War Two, and okays his plan to “invade” Europe and steal its best ideas.
(The US military really hasn’t won a
war since 1945, unless you want to count Grenada, a nation with an army the
size of the Massachusetts State Police but with less firepower.) Moore sets off
for Europe, draped in an American flag, which he intends to plant and claim like
a modern-day conquistador whenever he encounters an idea worthy of emulating.
His sojourn takes him across Europe and into northern Africa. For the most
part, though, Moore isn’t on camera as much as he usually is—he lets the details
speak for themselves.
Moore has been denounced as a propagandist. Interesting
word: propaganda. These days it tends to mean anything that makes us
uncomfortable, even if it’s true. We never call the things with which we agree
propaganda; we use nicer terms: advertising, marketing, infomercial, public
relations….. So spin these and tell me what’s wrong with them: free health care
supported by taxes that are less than
what Americans spend on insurance and co-pays (Germany); 80 paid vacation days
per year (Germany, Italy); two-hour lunches (Italy); factory owners who think wealth
should be capped and welcome employee input (Italy); a government that is half
women (Tunisia); or a land without student debt (Slovenia).
Moore’s travelogue reveals things that make American minds
boggle. Finland has the world’s best schools, yet has abolished homework and
standardized tests; Portugal decriminalized all
drugs, saw addiction rates plummet, and now has money to spend on treatment,
which is cheaper than prosecution and incarceration. The maximum prison
sentence in Norway is 23 years and that only for true sociopaths; most of its
jails are like summer camps—even for murderers—and even prisoners to maximum
security facilities are greeted by a video of guards singing “We are the
World.” French children eat school lunches worthy of top-rated restaurants and
are aghast when shown pictures of American hot lunches. (And they eat yummy
meals that cost less than US Mystery Meat specials!)
Best idea? Maybe Iceland. The US press was all over its 2008
financial crisis—one endlessly propagandized, sorry—“reported”—by outlets such
as Fox News and the Wall Street Journal as
“proof” that “socialism doesn’t work.” Did they report that a bank owned and
operated by women did not engage in
disastrous speculation and spearheaded the effort that led to full recovery in
less than three years? And did you read about how Iceland jailed the bankers responsible for the 2008 crisis?
Moore’s guerilla documentary style makes a lot of people
nervous, but it doesn’t make him wrong! Put down the laissez-faire Kool-aid and
dare to ask the hard questions Moore poses: If other countries can do this, why
can’t we? Is American business and government too male? Is testosterone
poisoning holding back America? Or is just greed? This film made me wonder whatever
happened to the attitude that Americans could do anything. When did a “Yes we
can!” nation degenerate into an “It’s too hard/It costs too much/It’s not my
problem/I blame it on the [fill in blanks]” bunch of whiny losers? Think I’m overly harsh? Moore asked
three Icelandic female business leaders a seemingly simple question: "What
would you like to say to Americans?" He was met with stony silence, until
one woman finally said, “Tell them I don’t want them to be my neighbors. They
are not good neighbors.” Are you fine with the fact that none of the three
could think of a single thing they found admirable about US society, its
culture, or its people? I'm not and neither is Moore—who is a much better patriot
than most of the idiots who wrap themselves in the flag.
Oh, yeah, ignore Michael Moore. Call him a propagandist.
Keep on paying for an inept military that wastes billions daily. We wouldn’t
want to build a safety net that would ruin our “self-reliance,” would we? Who
needs the rest of the world? I call such thinking narcissism, self-deception,
and fantasy. I call it the superhighway to self-destruction. This film should
be required viewing.
Rob Weir