Signs you Need, or Maybe Not

It's been a while since I posted silly signs. Here are a few with my commentary. You know you want it. Admit it. Just not in polite company. 

 

A rallying point for kids in Sutton PQ who meet to walk to school. Remember walking to school? Of course you don't.

And you guys say *I* have a hole in my head.

I mean, let's be fair chaps. Where is one supposed to park one's nifty vintage sports car?

I think this is for some company but from this day forth, all male sheep shall be named Roy.

I truly have no idea!

Adult chair on the left. Mine is the green one on the right.

What kind of an idiot do they think I am? I've been doing this for years. It's called spaghetti sauce.

(c) Rob Weir

Still More Signs of the Times

I'm so relieved. I hate it when my Norse buddies drop by and we run out of mead (or Spam)!
Salem, MA
















In Kennebunkport, but shouldn't it be in Provincetown? I'm just sayin'.
























Picky, picky, picky! Lexington, MA


















Owner did not major in marketing. Kennebunkport























I knew civilization was lurking somewhere! Sign in Ottawa, Canada but apparently one must go to Gatineau, Quebec to escape savagery.

More Signs of the Times

Witches in leather, or leather from witches? From Salem, MA--naturally.

Peerie is a Shetlands word that means "little." Why can't they say "wee" like the rest o' the Scots? From a shop in the middle of nowhere in the Shetlands.

With or without Viagara? Oqunquit, ME

This just seems to belong with the previous sign! From Williamsburg, MA.

Wilbur? Es usted? Thanks to Sacha.

Kind of says it all! Ottawa, ON

SIGNS TIMES THREE

Management advises they'll need extra time to clean the rooms and suggests avoiding the pool. --Hadley, MA












The importance of punctuation--Does the puppy get the pizza, or does he "get" it? Inquiring puppies want to know.--Haydenville, MA





Well, yeah--it's a natural combination!--North Hadley, MA
P.S. Where else but Hadley could such a cook-off exist!?

We have ways of making you become a friend of great coffee! Northampton, MA

We've drunk quite a bit of Melissa's coffee. It might not be the best, but the shop is indeed cute! Northampton, MA

MORE SIGNS

Do we want to eat at a fish restaurant where the seafood might eat us? From Gloucester, MA.








Who knew that dogs could read? Photo by Dominique Thiebaut.








We found this sign entirely ambiguous and couldn't figure out what message was being conveyed. From North Hartland, VT.

Our vote for the most unnecessary warning of all time, given that what's on either side of the bridge is....

This! From North Hartland, VT

SIGN LANGUAGE

Is this related to the sign below? We're just asking! (From Vergennes, VT)

Cool, but some towns have local ordinances against this sort of thing. (From Vergennes, VT)

Okay, we're convinced. We won't go barefoot in the shipyard. (From Boston. Photo courtesy of Bill Allen. Thanks Bill!)

But how are we supposed to practice our death-defying trapeze act? It's amazing--we do somersaults in midair while carrying buckets filled with the letter Z. (From Lerwick, Shetlands)

Thank goodness. We can't stand those Aberdeen-style toilets!
(From the Kelvingrove Museum in Glasgow.)

But what if the service was really good? (From Glasgow.)

Signs of the Times--Scottish Edition

One of the delights of traveling, for me, is noting the ways people in other cultures express themselves.

A simple street name may catch the eye



(in Stomness, Shetland Islands) note how someone has tried to erase the "i" to make it an even better name)


The local lingo makes a familiar sign new again




(Shetland Islands)







Sometimes a sign reveals a location's heritage



(Stromness, Shetland Islands)





Some are punny....


(Kirkwall, Orkney Islands)






But others--usually my favorites--have an inexplicable origin.


(liquor store window, Glasgow, Scotland)









—P.B.

Signs of the Times--June 17

For all you Baby Boomers out there--maybe we need to turn back the clock and take a few liver pills to alleviate our aches and pains! This sign is from Brattleboro, Vermont.

SIGNS of the Times--June 10

This unassuming "Signs Mean Business" message has double relevance for me...Not only did I spy it on the day I began collecting signs to share with you all, but it also reminds me of a great sign of which i didn't get a photo. That one was advertising an upcoming concert and was in the famous typeface and colors of the overnight delivery company, but this one advertised the performer: FredEx!

On the other hand, some signs mean no business...like this one from Downtown Northampton, MA. Apparently, no new knowledge was welcome that day.

And finally, here's a creative psychological appeal for tips from a coffee shop in Brattleboro, VT. It reads: "Fear Change? Leave Yours Here"

(The type is obscured because I was so excited about the impending start of the "Strolling of the Heifers" parade that i couldn't keep the camera still)

Stay tuned for more signs of the times, or share yours through the comment function of this blog.—P.B.

SIGNS of the Times

As a writer/editor, I am naturally a word person, but I read everything...and I mean everything! Not just books, magazines, web pages, blog posts, e-mails, and old-fashioned letters, but also cereal box ads, use instructions on shampoo bottles, the small print on my bills, and ingredient listings on packages.

So of course if there's a sign in the vicinity, I read it whether I intend to or not. I've seen lots of things I'd rather not have seen (such as "Glove's for Sale," "Up to 50% off and more!" "Share Our Strength's" and other instances of horrific grammar/spelling/punctuation) but I've also come across some fabulous signs.

Now you can share the joy of signs without having to be obsessed with reading them--that's my job.—P.B.

Pleasant St., Northampton, MA (remnant of a very old Nabisco product, long gone from supermarket shelves)










Portland, Maine (apparently even lobstahs love martinis)




Hadley Garden Center, MA (sign above cat-sized opening says "employee entrance")





...more signs to come in future posts